by elmads

Introduction

I’m a strong advocate of personal finance and investing. While it is an area and field where we always talk about money, not all advocates of this think about and live for it 24 hours a day.

I actually don’t blame others if they think that such individuals have only money in their minds, because if a person always talks about opportunities in the market, how to make money work for you, finding ways to efficiently handle and allocate your resources, how to protect your hard-earned money, and how to distribute it when the time comes, I would certainly and easily assume that this person is obsessed with money.

Yet, while this may sound funny to others, I don’t treasure money. Isn’t it ironic? a money guy who doesn’t treasure money? What a full load of Sh&T! hahaha! But that’s the truth.

Money is only a means to an end, and that end for me is to be able to live my life on my own terms. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not looking into reaching the top 1%, 10%, or even 50% richest people in the world, I don’t give a d@mn about that Sh&T; What I primarily value is the well-being aspect of my life.

My aim is to have a life where no one has direct leverage over my decisions. It’s as simple as this: no one should be able to stop me and tell me what I can and cannot do. Nonetheless, with this kind of freedom, I always make sure that I hold myself accountable for all the decisions that I make, whatever the outcome.

Personally, achieving such a level will take a lifetime, and mind you, it doesn’t only boil down to our financial well-being. For me, it needs to have what I call the Mythical 5 of Well-Being, or “FSHRM”. Financial, Spiritual, Health, Relationship, and Mental well-being.

Financial – Autonomy In Our Lives

I do completely agree that money is important, but only to some extent. First and foremost, money is essential to sustain our basic necessities of life, such as food, clothing, and shelter. A life deprived of this could have long-term health or social ramifications.

Health: It is children who are substantially impacted by this, with malnutrition being one of the leading causes of deaths worldwide among children under 5 years of age as per the World Health Organisation (https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/malnutrition). Poverty is closely related to such malnutrition. The lack of essential food in a community or the lack of employment and, in turn, no money to purchase their basic necessities of life

Social: The Crime rate increases in areas of poverty, where food, shelter, and clothing are hard to come by. Though there are a lot more factors that influence such problems, it is an undeniable fact that money is one of them.

Having too much money can also be unhelpful for some. Have you already heard of the phrase “more money, more problems?” I certainly have. Though I don’t have such problems, it is still deemed true by some individuals who have reached high income and high net worth status. More money means more responsibility, and this could attract people who want to take advantage of their accumulated wealth.

Furthermore, having more money without knowing what to do with it is another major issue. Building something for yourself, for society, and for helping others could bridge that gap, but not everyone is meant to be a builder of something. This is where I completely agree with what the majority of people say: “Having too much money is bad because you’ll not be able to do anything with it”. Nevertheless, for builders, money is only a means to an end and not the actual goal. At the end of the day, money is just a piece of paper or a digital number in your bank account.

There was a study done by Princeton researchers Daniel Kahneman and August Deaton in 2010, where they found out that happiness and money felt by individuals happen only up until a specific amount, approximately $75,000 USD per person per year. (https://www.pnas.org/doi/10.1073/pnas.1011492107)

On the contrary, another study from the Wharton School begs to differ; it found out that happiness and well-being increase with the amount of money a person makes, even beyond $75,000 USD. (https://penntoday.upenn.edu/news/money-matters-to-happiness-perhaps-more-than-previously-thought)

Both articles are indeed interesting to read. Though both of them have different sample sizes, hypotheses, views, and findings, I still find one commonality. Money gives autonomy to the person who knows how to use it, spends it wisely, saves it, and grows it for future use.

Financial well-being is important as a means of giving a person more options in their lives. That we are not held hostage by the economy even if it goes into recession, and even if we get laid off today, we’ll still be absolutely fine.

Also, if we get into any accidents, diseases, or even if we pass away, money will not add anymore to the emotional problems that such health problems bring upon a person and his family.

The autonomy to choose and have control over our lives. That, for me, is financial well-being.

Spiritual – Meaning, Purpose and Connection to something Greater than Ourselves

Remember what I said in the Financial well-being part? where I wrote, “Having more money without knowing what to do with it is another major issue”. Builders need money to build, while for those who are not, having a lot of money will just be a burden for them.

Builders need money not because they’re greedy but because they have this need to build something. It can be a product or a service. But to build something from scratch requires not just money, resources, knowledge and skills but also your purpose and grit to see through things regardless of the hardships for the rest of your life.

This is where spiritual well-being comes into the picture. Finding passion and purpose, a connection so great that it’s not about us anymore but other people in this world.

Please don’t misunderstand what I wrote here. Giving value and helping others doesn’t mean that you should be doing what the visionaries of our time should be doing.

Purpose varies in every individual, and this can be on a larger scale or even at a minor level. Serving others other than yourself can also be done specifically for a person, a small group, or within your community. Even raising your children means serving others more than yourself and raising them into the best possible version that they could achieve in their lifetime.

Spirituality is also a connection to our beliefs and religion, which are connections greater than ourselves.

Health – A Longer Life

Nothing beats a life with a healthy body and mind. The ability to move and think freely is where diseases and illnesses have a lower chance of polluting our current and future bodily lives, especially when compared to their unhealthy counterparts.

Health and fitness are necessary for us to be able to continue to execute our purpose, secure our financial well-being, further enjoy life with our significant others, and continuously fortify our mental fortress for as long as we can.

Heavily focusing on accumulating money at the expense of health is like running through a dynamite factory with a burning match. You could survive a couple of minutes, or hours if you’re lucky, but you’ll eventually kill yourself. Or, to put it as Joel Greenblatt harshly said “You’re still an idiot”.

Old, rich, and having a lot of health issues. I’ll pass on that offer; I absolutely prefer being wealthy and healthy and not being afraid of getting old. 😉

If things turn out smoothly for us, meaning no diseases, illnesses, or accidents that are not within our control befall us when we get old, Then think of it like this: you are 60 and above but still able to run, lift weights, swim, or do whatever sports you want (preferably less extreme sports for safety purposes) and still be able to play with your grandchildren or great-grandchildren. That is indeed a wonderful, healthy, and fit life.

“I’m into wellbeing, not because of social pressures to look a certain way, but because I’m interested in living a long, full, and healthy life.”

—Kelly Brook

Relationship – Connection

Relationships are our social wellness. Our connection with our spouse, family, friends, colleagues, and community. This varies with every individual, as not everyone is an outgoing person who could easily communicate and connect with someone else.

This certainly can still be changed and improved, provided that we still try to develop and maintain a positive connection with other people.

These connections with others are also beneficial for us to learn new things that we have not yet experienced or probably will never experience in our lifetime. Remember, we only have one life and presumably 100 years to live, so there are more than 7 billion individuals in the world who have their own life experiences.

We would not be able to experience and learn what they have experienced and learned. Being able to have connections with other people could slowly bridge that gap.

Social well-being aids us in learning different points of view in life by talking, making connections with others, and strengthening those connections. Although not every encounter will be fruitful, some will be hard and toxic. Yet those are the things that we also get to learn down the line. The dos and don’ts of life and its relationships.

Moreover, when all things are set and done, the only ones left will be yourself and the people whom you’ve touched, helped, and loved.

“‘There isn’t time, so brief is life, for bickerings, apologies, heartburnings, and callings to account. There is only time for loving, and but an instant, so to speak, for that’ —Mark Twain

The good life is built with good relationships.”

— Dr.Robert Waldinger.

Mental – The Control Centre

We can’t control the outcome or our environment, but what we can control is how we perceive an event and, in turn, the actions we take afterwards.

“We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more in our imagination than in reality.”

—Seneca

Most of our lives problems are products of our brains and imaginations. Though there are absolutely real problems in our world that are unfortunate and life-changing, it is also true that we tend to further magnify the gravity of such problems.

This puts us into a meditative state, not of positivity but of negativity, pondering deeply on problems that can multiply our distress several times, and could even transform into a spiral of anxiety if not prevented.

“If you want something good, get it from yourself.”

—Epectitus

I always say this to myself: If you’re looking for a hero to save you, just look in the mirror.

We could receive the best worldly wisdom we could have from the best philosophical and intelligent persons of this world, but if we do not take action to realise those advices, then those advices are just words blown away by the wind. At the end of the day, it’s you who will decide and take action on what to do next.

You want to lose weight? Be financially free? To try to live longer? Have a good relationship with your children and wife/husband? Want to have a strong mental coping mechanism? Want to find your passion and purpose? Want to serve others? It’s indeed achievable, but only if you’re willing to do it yourself. Be your own superhero and save yourself.

I truly believe that our mental well-being is the root of the previous three, which are Financial, health, and relationships. This and spiritual well-being encompass all other aspects of our well-being. Both are the control centre, the starting point, the motivator, and the guide for us to be able to take actions to achieve our other well-being endeavours.

This is also the reason why changing and shaping our mindset will always be a part of a better change in our lives.

Build a resilient and strong mental fortress that can withstand shocks, unforeseen events, and situations that could substantially help us make better decisions in our lives.

I’ll share with you a paragraph from a book by William Green titled “Richer, Wiser, Happier: How the world’s greatest investors win in the market and life” that relates to mental fortitude.

Money can provide an invaluable cushion, a lifeline, and a critical defence against uncertainty and misfortune. But it’s not enough. We also need the mental fortitude and resilience to weather those storms and rebuild in their wake. For most of us, the quality of our lives depends less on our finances than on inner attributes such as equilibrium, acceptance, hope, trust, appreciation, and determined optimism. As John Milton wrote in Paradise Lost, which he dictated after going blind, ‘The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven.’“

To Sum It Up

There is certainly more to life than money. But! This must not be used as an excuse to try our best to make more money. Instead, it is a way of encouraging us to see the bigger picture—that money is only a part of many other aspects of our lives, and not seeing it means losing a substantial part of our humanity.

Make more money, find your passion and purpose, be healthy and fit, have a wonderful relationship with others, and have a resilient and antifragile mental fortress.

Who wouldn’t want such a well diversified life?

Nonetheless, we still have to be realistic enough to understand that we will not be able to have a well-balanced life despite doing our best. There will always be an aspect of our well-being that is our least priority. It is not that we choose not to put any importance on it; it’s just that we have our own different personalities, life circumstances, upbringing, culture, and beliefs that influence our decisions in life.

That is not to say that we’ll not be able to learn how to understand the well-being aspects of our lives, the ones that we put less weight on,  because we definitely still can.

Whatever aspect of well-being you put more of your time and effort into, I do hope that you’re making an intended decision and accepting its ramifications, whether they are good or bad. So that if the time comes, you’ll have less regret for the actions you’ve taken before.

FSHRM, my mythical five of well-being.

Knowledge is my Sword and Patience is my Shield,

elmads

This blog is for informational purposes only and not a Financial Recommendation. Not all information will be accurate. Consult an independent financial professional before making any major financial decisions.